Her Green Figs

The fig tree putteth forth her green figs, and the vines with the tender grape give a good smell.

11 July 2006

43 Things That I'm Thinking About

1. Violet cannot possibly be anyone's natural eye color.
2. My brand new grill came without the knobby thing to turn on the extra burner.
3. Power painters simply do not work.
4. It is entirely possible that I could fall in love with a man who does nothing other than to leave me a voicemail that says, "I'm taking your power painter to the hardware store tomorrow to see what they suggest. I'm also going to pick up some more tape and drop off the overdue library books I found in the dining room. Call me when you get home to say good night."
5. Do I not notice any more when STRAIGHT men are nice to me? Or are they just not nice to me? If so, why?
6. Zits that hide in hair are cagey little devils.
7. Johnny Depp is WONDERFUL. He's awfully good as a (Disney) pirate, even though I prefer him as a Celtic pirate (Chocolat).
8. 45 minutes of Johnny Depp being a pirate would be better than 2 hours of Johnny Depp and a whole lot of other people I don't care about running around in some silly plot (though the costuming was quite nice).
9. 44 oz. of Diet Cherry Coke is NOT EQUIVALENT to 8 hours of sleep.
10. 31 is probably too old to go to work after just 3 hours of sleep.
11. 31 is NOT too old to stay up all night smoking, playing 20 Questions, lying around on a stranger's bed, and googling real people we know.
12. Apparently, $84,000 is not a lot of money after all.
13. A 3% raise is practically invisible and doesn't even buy one nice dishwasher.
14. A part-time salary that is HALF my previous full-time salary becomes really uncomfortable once I've spent the $84,000 that was in my bank account(s).
15. I need another $84,000.
16. No, I WANT another $84,000.
17. If I don't go to England on Friday, I could go to that party Saturday night and find myself a handsome and smart and talented straight man over whom to swoon.
18. I'm still swooning over the handsome and smart and talented and immature and addicted and sloppy and already taken (though not formally) man I already know about.
19. I have lost my talent of picking paint colors. My taupe turned out to be caramel and my misty lavender turned out to be very Dr. Seussical. God only knows what the green for the kitchen is going to look like!
20. People are actually registering for my conference. Now I actually have to go through with planning and staging it. Darnit.
21. Swearing at church, even if it's in the choir room and even if it's Anglican, is still frowned upon. Whoops.
22. 44 oz. of Diet Cherry Coke DOES equal having to go to the bathroom often.
23. I really do enjoy days when I attend four entirely separate social events, all of which are planned fewer than 60 minutes before they occur.
24. I can really sing!
25. But I should memorize the words to more songs.
26. People like me! They really like me!
27. I am desperately in need of a good snog.
28. If I don't go to England on Friday, I can see all three of my aunts, one of my uncles (the only one who counts), my brother, my sister-in-law, and my nephew on Sunday.
29. If I don't go to England on Friday, I don't have to work on Sunday.
30. My new house is HUGE. I hope I can arrange for it to be consistently filled with people both well known and new.
31. Nobody can make a living adjunct teaching in SC technical colleges.
32. One semester's adjunct salary will buy a refrigerator and the reupholstering of one chair.
33. I love having a man's energy in my house. I'd forgotten.
34. I should smile more.
35. I am not that special. Lots of people have travelled the world, know when to use sesame oil, play multiple instruments, speak multiple languages, can navigate LC call numbers, know how to set a proper table, recreate with prescription drugs, renovate their kitchens, read good books, and have $84,000.
36. I'm probably overdoing my purple thing.
37. Most people are really bad gift-givers.
38. I really love to drive and I'm really good at it.
39. I miss driving a manual transmission.
40. I've been practicing being vulnerable, but I'm still not very good at it and I don't really know how to practice it more.
41. Spectacles DO make their wearers appear more thoughtful when they are worn less often than constantly.
42. I should finish that story about W and Miss Anne and give it to MS before she moves all the way across the country.
43. EH could probably be a pretty good friend if she doesn't move and I make the effort.